I've really been thinking.
I like relationships and all.
The whole, I love you...I want to be with you forever.
That kind of stuff, the stuff chicks usually totally dig.
I'm all for that.
But I know that I'll also be gone in a few months...and then even after that, life has so many turning points.
So many variables.
I can't account for them all.
What I'm saying is...I know that I want a serious, down to earth, real relationship.
Commitment and all.
I don't worry about any of that.
All I know is that I want guys.
I like pleasure...what girl doesn't?
But the way I think I'm going to be most happy at the moment is if I don't make all these connections now only to break them when I leave.
I'd rather not have anything too serious, have fun with these last few months...make the most of my time here.
Which is totally what I am doing.
I've fallen in love before, I know how much it hurts to be rejected by the one fallen for.
I also know that if I make such a commitment before I leave...I'll either end up hurting myself or him.
I don't want that either.
I'm such a compassionate person...I can't stand the feeling of hurting somebody because of my stupid decisions...there's no reason for that.
Sigh.
I want to feel love though, I know the feeling, and I'm looking for it all over again.
But I know what that will do to my dreams...and I will not compromise on any of it.
So...do I look for love, or just go out and have a good time before college?
Agh! Not something I want to worry about at the moment...but totally necessary. Oh well....I'll know soon enough.
I enjoyed your post, it is something that I went through and everyone will at one point in their life. . I love love, but not the type of love that everyone expects us to have. I love the love that will sit with you but not have to say the words because you both already know it. I think that kind of love creeps up and finds you. No need to search for it.
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